For most of us, we have 1 or more people in our lives that we consider especially important. This may be our close friends, a parent, sibling, or grandparent. We respect this person and appreciate them in our lives. Because of this, most of us don’t just bring anyone we’re dating over to meet them. We value this person’s opinion and therefore, have a strong desire for them to approve of our love interest. Maybe you’ve had the experience of your closest friends/family not approving of someone you’re dating. It stinks. It can also cause major conflict and create a headache for you especially.
In my last post, we talked about my first red flag of dating, when he doesn’t initiate conversations whether by text or phone call (Check it out here https://fullpotentialcounseling.com/4-signs-hes-not-into-you-you-initiate-communication/). This post will focus on my second red flag, which is when he doesn’t bring you around his friends or family.
- Have you started dating someone new and, though you’ve already introduced him to your closest friends, you haven’t met his?
- Maybe you’ve been dating for a few months, and you keep hinting at spending time with his friends, but it never actually happens.
- Maybe you’ve asked about meeting his family, but he always has an excuse.
It’s important to note that these red flags being discussed in this blog series are so very common, so don’t think you are alone in your experience.
Why We Introduce Who We are Dating:
Let’s take a minute to think about why we introduce our love interest to our friends and family to begin with.
- Because they mean something to you, you want the other important people in your life to get to know them.
- You want to get their opinion and, hopefully, approval of your love interest.
- You want your significant other to get along with your friends and family so that there’s no awkwardness at future get-togethers.
Truth is, friends and family tend to be pretty important in the development of a relationship. With that being said, if the person you’re dating hasn’t made any moves to introduce you to his friends or family, you may want to pause for a second.
Generally, I think people tend to view introducing someone to family as a bigger step than introducing them to friends. However, if you’ve been dating someone for a few months, and he still hasn’t introduced you to any of his friends, that may be a red flag. In my experience, most often this correlates to his interest in you. The more he’s into you, the more he’s excited to show you off to the people he’s closest to.
What Do I Do?
So what do you do if you find yourself in this boat?
- Pick a time where you can sit down face to face and talk with your signifiant other.
- Calmly bring your concern to them.
- See what their response is.
Did he make excuses? Try to minimize the situation like it’s not a big deal? Maybe he didn’t realize how important it is for you to meet the people that are important to him, and he’ll make plans to make it a reality. Unfortunately, it’s possible that you are more into him than he is into you. If that’s the case, take a couple of deep breaths. You are unique and amazing. If this one person doesn’t agree, believe me, there’s someone that will come along that will be totally bonkers for you. You have to decide whether you want to stay the course with this person or end things early on.
If any of this resonates with you or maybe you are in a similar situation, I’d love to talk more about how you can best deal with your situation. Give me a call at 904-204-9308 or email me at [email protected] to schedule your first session.