Is Self-Care Selfish?

Part 3 of The Wonder Woman Series

Your busy juggling all the things. Work, kids, cleaning, cooking, appointments, extracurricular activities, and on and on. As women, taking care of ourselves often falls to the bottom of our to-do list. It’s not until we reach a breaking point, do we ask for help or demand it at that point.

Why do we put ourselves and self-care last on the list?

Why do we wait until we are exhausted and angry to ask for help?

The term self-care has become such a buzz word in our society. I’ve seen some interesting memes that are positive about self-care while I’ve also seen others that kind of down the whole idea. So what is self-care exactly?

What is Self-Care?

I define self-care as taking care of yourself, mind, body and spirit. Here’s the thing, I believe self-care is unique to each of us, much like how I define success in the first blog post of this series. (You can find that post here:

Please don’t let anyone tell you that self-care is silly or not needed. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion, but take it from someone who pushed self-care to last on the list for too long. Self-care is necessary! As a fellow Wonder Woman, you have to take the time to care for yourself. Truth is, we go through phases in life. Sometimes we need more self-care while there are other times when we don’t necessarily need it quite as much. Either way it’s super important to take care of yourself.

What Self-Care Isn’t

Self-care is not being selfish. It’s not thinking you are better than someone else or more deserving. You are not a bad person for prioritizing your well-being.

Women tend to be the ones that care for others in general. Women, more often than not, are the ones to step up and care for others in need. Siblings, aging or sick parents, friends or neighbors in need, and of course children are typically cared for more often by women. Frankly, I think that it’s part of our gifting as women. We just tend to make better caregivers. We are natural nurturers.

A Few of My Favorite Self-Care Tips and Tricks

Here are some examples of self-care activities. It’s all about finding out what works for you because what works for me, may not work for you and vice versa.

  • Eating “good for you” foods
  • Drinking plenty of water
  • Stopping to take good cleansing breaths/doing a guided meditation exercise
  • Movement/stretching/exercise
  • Reading a good book
  • Journaling
  • Puzzles
  • Cooking/baking
  • Gardening
  • Dancing and/or singing to some of your favorite music
  • Learning about an interest area of yours
  • Yoga
  • Talking to good friend that always makes you laugh
  • Manicures/Pedicures/Massages
  • Watching a favorite tv show or movie
  • Learning something new 

Making Self-Care a Priority

These are just some of the things that you can do that are ways to care for yourself.  If you’re a list maker, then you should add a self-care to the list so you make sure you check it off daily or weekly. If you live by your planner, then block out a time slot for self-care (even 5 minutes!) each day or on a weekly basis. How often you engage in self-care is entirely up to you and your circumstances. The key is knowing that it may take a little trial and error to figure out which activities are most meaningful to you. What self-care activities would you add to the list?

Self-care can be really tough to implement, especially if you don’t feel you deserve it, or you feel you can’t take a break from your duties and responsibilities. Working together, we can come up with a plan for self-care that fits you and your current circumstances. Learn how to take care of you, so you can best take care of others. Call or email me at 904-204-9308/[email protected]

Maria Inoa

Maria Inoa

Maria Inoa is a licensed clinical social worker and the owner of Full Potential Counseling. With over 12 years of experience, she specializes in working with women on building healthier relationships with themselves and others. She strongly believes that women are warriors and that every woman has worth, significance, and purpose. Maria provides in-person sessions at her office in the Ortega area as well as online sessions for the busy woman. For a free phone/online consultation or to schedule a session with Maria, call 904-204-9308 or email her at [email protected]